Once I took my hardware wallet with me at a bitcoin meetup. When it sensed Pieter Wuille it started begging him for a signature.
Miners pay Pieter Wuille to include his transactions.
Satoshi Nakamoto is really an AI, created by Future Pieter Wuille, that was sent back in time to create bitcoin.
Pieter Wuille is so much above the Ballmer Peak that if you add him to the graph you can't see the old curve anymore.
Blocks containing transactions by Pieter Wuille propagate faster than other blocks.
When the Wikipedia servers corrupted all data including backups, Pieter Wuille had to stay awake all night to retype it.
Pieter Wuille wrote a one-digit checksum algorithm to prevent people misspelling his name.
Greg Maxwell is a bot created by Pieter Wuille to argue on reddit while he can get code done.
Pieter Wuille can say "libsecp256k1" 5 times faster than you can.
It is a Bitcoin consensus rule that when Pieter's hard drive is full no more blocks can be added.